i just saw an ad that was probably supposed to say accident lawyers but it said accidental lawyers and i can’t sotp laughing “just got my law degree aw man this wasn’t what i meant to do how am i gonna get out of this one”
once when i was little, i claimed it was a teacher’s work day so i wouldn’t have to go to school and mom’s not an idiot so of course it didn’t work, but when we got to the school, we found it was a teacher’s work day and that made me think i had super powers so i started trying to kill classmates with my mind to confirm the theory
You thought you had super powers so you immediately attempted to murder everyone
I’m all fevery and have an itchy rash and a headache and fucking downstairs are playing their music but oh wait it’s me dropping things occasionally over her living room giving her sleepless nights not her playing her music and screaming under my bedroom giving me sleepless nights.
Seriously hope this is just the flu but keeping an eye on it…